First lets set
the
mood
A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing
in
the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an
hour,
the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.
"But why?," they asked, as they moved off.
"Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open
foyer."
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Teacher Arrested!
At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual
later discovered to
be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight
while
in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide
rule, and a
calculator.
At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft
said he
believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement.
He is
being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math
instruction.
"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Ashcroft said. "They
desire average
solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents
in a
search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and
'y'
and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they
belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with
coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles
used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush
said, "If God
had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He
would have
given us more fingers and toes."
Links (As I find them):
Scientific
names gone funny.